After My Rebirth Chapter 40: Selfish desires

Chapter 40: Selfish desires

Translated by Addis of Exiled Rebels Scanlations

Editor: Karai

 

After Jiang Rongxuan reminded him, Li Sinian suddenly remembered—it really had happened that way. He gave an awkward smile. “Now that you mention it, I do remember.”

“Hmm, getting you to recall something isn’t easy,” Jiang said with a grin.

Their conversation about the past opened the floodgates of memories, and the two fell into a long discussion about their high school days. Li Sinian had thought his dream was pretty complete before, but listening to Jiang’s account, he realized he had forgotten a lot.

Halfway through their meal, the doorbell rang, cutting their conversation short.

Li Sinian went to open the door and saw Lian Menglei standing there.

The truth of the past had been uncovered, and Lian Menglei no longer restrained herself. She was desperate to make amends and came over whenever she had the chance. No matter how Li Sinian treated her, she persisted in asking for his forgiveness.

Li Sinian knew his mother had suffered, but it was a lie to say he felt no resentment toward her. If only she had cared more about him before, maybe his childhood and adolescence wouldn’t have been so miserable.

He let her in but barely acknowledged her presence. He returned to the table and continued eating with Jiang Rongxuan.

Jiang’s eyes flickered between the two silently, finally letting out a soft sigh.

Since moving here, Li Sinian had never hired a housekeeper; he did all the chores himself. Lian Menglei didn’t speak much either—she quietly took off her coat and started tidying up.

Like any mother in an ordinary family, she washed Li Sinian’s dirty clothes, cleaned the leftover dishes, wiped the dirty spots on the floor, and changed the bedsheets when needed.

Though she was the CEO of a listed company, she worked at these chores with surprising skill. After finishing all the cleaning, she hesitated before entering the living room, unsure whether to say anything to Li Sinian.

Jiang Rongxuan caught her eye, then stood up. “brother, I’ve eaten enough. If there’s nothing else, I’ll head out. I’ll come see you again tomorrow.”

“Okay,” Li Sinian said as he stood to see him off.

After Jiang left, the house fell quiet except for mother and son.

Lian Menglei washed her hands and then sat down beside Li Sinian. “A’Nian, what did you have for dinner with Little Jiang tonight?”

Li Sinian named a few dishes.

She smiled. “That sounds wonderful. Too bad I came too late to try any.”

He hummed in reply, eyes glued to his phone.

After a pause, she leaned over to peek at his screen. “What are you looking at?”

“Game. Candy Crush,” he answered. “It’s late. You should head home.”

She knew he was politely ushering her out, but today was special. She really wanted to spend this day with her son. “A’Nian, today’s almost over. Please, let me stay until midnight, will you?”

He glanced at her. “Fine.”

He got up to go to his room, then stopped and pointed toward a bedroom. “If it’s too late for you to go back, you can sleep there. But be sure to leave early in the morning.”

She didn’t answer.

Just as Li Sinian turned to enter his room, she called out, “A’Nian!”

She had so much to say, but when he looked back, she couldn’t get the words out. Her lips trembled, and all she managed was a quiet, “I’m sorry.”

Li Sinian barely responded before closing the door behind him.

That night, he dreamed again—this time about his childhood. When he was little, Li Wenxing’s childhood was happy. There were trips to amusement parks with mom and dad, parent-teacher conferences attended by dad, and although mom was busier, she still found time for him.

The memories were hazy now, but in the dream, he could clearly see everyone’s expressions. A happy family of three: Li Cheng smiling, Li Wenxing smiling… but Lian Menglei’s face was expressionless. Though she had accompanied Li Wenxing through childhood, her face never showed a smile.

He remembered now.

When he was very young, Li Cheng didn’t give him many lessons or responsibilities, so he had plenty of free time. Without anyone to play with, he spent those moments lost in thought. One recurring question haunted him: Why was mom always so unhappy? She never seemed happy to take his younger brother out—would she be happy to take him? But she never took him anywhere.

Now he thought he understood. Mom never smiled because she was playing the role of the perfect wife and mother to Li Cheng and Li Wenxing out of spite. The person she loved had betrayed their promise, and she wanted to show him that she could live well even without him.

How many tragedies had Li Cheng’s selfish desires caused?

The next morning, Li Sinian woke to sounds in the kitchen. Lian Menglei was there, an apron tied around her waist, cooking breakfast.

Her figure in the kitchen slowly overlapped with his memories of her—but while the Lian Menglei in his dream always wore a sharp suit, this one wore comfortable home clothes and an apron.

Hearing the noise, she turned around and smiled warmly. “A’Nian, you’re up! I made some breakfast—hope it suits your taste.”

The Lian Menglei in his memories usually looked stern, lips turned down.

But this one’s mouth lifted at the corners, eyes gentle. A shame the tenderness came so late.

Li Sinian stared a moment longer, then replied softly and sat down at the table. They ate facing each other, only the sounds of bowls and chopsticks clinking filled the room.

After finishing in silence, Lian Menglei hurried to clear the dishes. She changed clothes, said nothing, grabbed her bag, and left. Li Sinian sank back into the sofa, eyes down on his phone.

For some reason, his mood was heavy.

Before he knew it, it was already noon. Li Sinian glanced up at the clock and was startled to realize he had been sitting on the couch all morning.

The problem with days that are too quiet is how quickly time slips away.

Stretching his stiff limbs, he stood up. Since he’d eaten breakfast late, he wasn’t very hungry now, so he decided to go out for a walk.

He’d been hearing the clatter of tools and hammering noises from the neighbor’s yard since morning. Now, stepping outside, he saw it was because the neighbors were moving.

The old tenants had left, and new ones were moving in.

Among the renovation crew, one figure caught his eye — it looked familiar.

Focusing in, he recognized Lian Menglei, who had left his house that very morning.

She seemed to notice his gaze and glanced over. After signaling the workers to keep going, she started walking toward him.

Li Sinian looked at the house, then back at her. “You’re moving in here?”

“Yeah.” She tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear. “After so many busy years, coming here often made me realize I actually prefer a simpler life. So, I quit my job and moved in.”

“A’Nian, I know I never gave you a happy childhood. I don’t deserve to ask you to share this peaceful time with me now.”

“It’s okay. I’m not asking for anything. Just living next to you, being able to stop by occasionally—that’s enough for me.”

Li Sinian looked away, let out a long sigh, and after a long silence, said, “Do as you like.”