Translated by Addis of Exiled Rebels Scanlations
Editor: KarateChopMonkey
When Gu ZhuXiao was five years old, his parents took him and his pee spirit on a vacation to Chaya Beach. He was busy every day catching birds and fish, repairing castles, climbing trees, and going down to the sea and thought everything was perfect.
——It would have been better if the pee spirit hadn’t followed.
The pee spirit was his sister, called Gu ZhuZi, an Omega less than a year old.
His father (LRK) said that both Gu ZhuXiao and the pee spirit were born from him, but Gu ZhuXiao didn’t believe him.
——The children were obviously hatched from the eggs of the gray beast, and the powerful ones became children, and the not so powerful ones became gray beasts. Gu ZhuZi was supposed to become a gray beast and pee everywhere on the ground. But because it was his sister, she had the honor to become a child.
Gu ZhuXiao was convinced since he had stopped using diapers before he was even a month old, but she was still wearing diapers all day long when she was almost a year old. Twice, she peed on Gu ZhuXiao’s favorite blanket after she had just taken a bath and didn’t have time to put it on.
What was worse, she also grabbed whatever she saw.
She would take his food and toys, but she could throw them away in a heartbeat and take Gu ZhuXiao’s share.
When Father returned from a mission and brought him the local flavor of jerky, pee spirit obviously couldn’t chew, but she had to pull out of her mouth all over what was his, and drool slid down the corners of her mouth, while she looked at him, giggling.
It was particularly annoying.
Why was she not a gray beast?
They have been living in a villa next to a small town for some time, and there were patches of purple lavender flowers everywhere. There was a vegetable patch behind the villa, and Mom and Father would wrap vegetable rolls in the patch and feed them to each other, kissing each other as they ate, and giving him a bite. The taste was so spicy and pungent that he almost got tears in his eyes, and he also learned to roll one himself and feed it to the mouth of the pee spirit in the stroller by the ground.
The disappointing thing was that the pee spirit ate it very well and reached out for the next one. He immediately lost interest in continuing to roll vegetables. They also went to see Tai Gong Gong and the yard where Mom lived as a child. His grandparents live in a place called the cemetery, where Mom was in tears, being held in Dad’s arms and gently patted on the back.
Early this morning, Dad drove them to the city to go shopping, because Mom said that many daily necessities were missing from the house. But Gu ZhuXiao thought it was actually those diapers of the pee spirit that were going to run out.
This mall wasn’t as big as the one in Sasu but it had a lot of items inside. They went to the supermarket on the underground floor and bought so many things that both shopping carts were almost full. Lan Yu and Lu RanKong were handsome, and the two children inherited their looks, looking just like two dolls. The family of four attracted countless people’s attention.
Gu ZhuXiao and Gu ZhuZi sat in a cart each and were pushed separately. When passing by the snack section, Gu ZhuXiao took the desired snacks off the shelves and threw them in the shopping cart pushed by Lu RanKong behind him. Gu ZhuXiao found that when he took a packet of chips, Gu ZhuZi would also reach for it, and if she couldn’t reach it, she would point to the chips and say in a milky voice, “Mom, ZiZi wants it.”
“You can’t eat it, you can only eat it when you grow up to be as big as your brother.” Lan Yu patiently explained.
“No! XiaoXiao has it, ZiZi doesn’t.” Gu ZhuZi stubbornly pointed at the chips, several small fleshy nubs moving on the tips of her hand. Although Gu ZhuZi was less than a year old, she was very articulate and Lan Yu had to take the bag of chips and throw it in the shopping cart.
This was where Gu ZhuXiao’s dissatisfaction came in. When he was the same age as Gu ZhuZi, he could only say, ‘Mom, hug. Dad, bad.’ He was a little sad as he thought about it, and then he deliberately chose those hard and dry snacks. Sure enough, Gu ZhuZi followed suit and chose a pile of nuts and dried meat.
“Xiao Xiao.” Seeing Gu ZhuXiao turn his head to look at her, Gu ZhuZi grinned, revealing a few tiny teeth on the top and bottom. Her teeth were also much longer than he had at her age.
Gu ZhuXiao pursed his lips and turned his head back coldly.
After Lu RanKong put all the items in the car after paying the bill, the family went back to the third floor to eat. This time Dad complimented the cooking and had to make them admit that it tasted good, so Gu ZhuXiao had lost the enthusiasm he had for the meal. In fact, Dad’s cooking wasn’t too bad, but it was very tiresome to eat every day, and none of the fried chicken could be eaten at all. But the restaurant’s food smelled good and made him feel good about eating again.
Even Gu ZhuZi, who had been pushing back every time she ate, used a small spoon to dig into the bowl of creamy mashed potatoes in front of her, spooning one after another into her mouth, without being fed. This was what made Gu ZhuXiao sad. Pee spirit could now use a spoon, and could even spoon up beans, not spilling any.
When he was her age, he was still grabbing with his hands until he was almost a year old, and he was now still unable to deal with beans skillfully. When he encountered a dish with the most annoying beans in it, he simply didn’t eat them. It was only when his father whispered to him that he himself couldn’t handle beans until he was five years old that Gu ZhuXiao felt better.
Only Lan Yu said to Lu RanKong as he ate, “Look at this slice of meat. It’s cut a full four millimeters, it’s not as good as your cut at all, and the taste is average, it can’t catch up to your craft.”
“Keep it low, keep it low.” Lu RanKong coughed with his hand against his mouth, looking reserved, but his eyes were full of complacency.
The two were talking and laughing about their meal when they heard several gunshots suddenly coming from the ground floor lobby, followed by running and screaming as someone ran up the escalator. The people in the restaurant heard the commotion, although they didn’t know what happened, they looked at each other nervously.
Lu RanKong put down his dishes and said to Lan Yu, “I’ll go check it out, you wait first.” He walked quickly to the door, grabbed a man who was running forward, and asked, “What’s happening?”
The man had no time to answer and tried to break free from Lu RanKong’s hand and run on, but after struggling a few times, he couldn’t break free and had to answer, “There are many people with guns coming in the door, and they just killed a few in the hall! Run!”
His voice was so urgent and sharp that the whole restaurant heard it and exploded with a bang. They couldn’t be bothered to eat and ran upstairs with the crowd. Lan Yu quickly picked up Gu ZhuZi, who was still digging into the mashed potatoes, from the baby seat, and picked up Gu ZhuXiao with his other hand, kicked away the chairs in front of him, and strode to the door of the restaurant.
Bang! Bang! Bang!
Downstairs there was another series of gunshots and screams, while a gruff male voice rang out, “All of you go to the top floor! Whoever fucking hides and doesn’t move, if you are found, you’ll be shot.”
Lu RanKong had rushed against the flow of people to the stairway, pressed himself against the wall and looked down, and gestured to the rear. Lan Yu understood that this was to tell him that there were at least fifteen bandits below. Gu ZhuXiao tilted his head to look at Lan Yu’s face and saw that his jaw was tight, some vague understanding that he couldn’t make any noise or fuss now, and also resisted the curiosity to ask questions very sensibly.
Gu ZhuZi sat on Lan Yu’s other arm, still clinging to the bowl of mashed potatoes, digging a spoonful into her mouth with difficulty, her bulging cheeks moving one by one.
Gu ZhuXiao regretted not having the cake in his hand in time.
Lu RanKong quickly ran back, picked up Gu ZhuXiao, and pulled Lan Yu in the direction of the restaurant kitchen, saying under his breath, “The top floor is very empty, there’s nowhere to hide, so they must be trying to concentrate people into the sweep. Hide in here.”
“What about you?” Lan Yu asked quickly.
Lu RanKong shoved Lan Yu, who was holding Gu ZhuZi, into a space behind the refrigerator, and put Gu ZhuXiao, who was in his hand, into his arms, and said, “I have to stop them, I can’t let them come up to this level.”
Lan Yu was tempted to say something, but in the end, he only kissed Lu RanKong on the mouth and said in a hoarse voice, “I can’t go to help you, so you have to be careful.”
Lu RanKong pulled a gun from the back of his waist, clicked off the safety, and said, “Don’t worry, I will be very careful. And don’t be nervous, we dealt with a lot more bandits than this last time.”
“We have the children this time.” Lan Yu said.
Lu RanKong kissed him on the lips again and said, “Don’t be afraid, we won’t let anything happen to the babies.”
Seeing Lu RanKong about to leave the kitchen, Gu ZhuXiao panicked and called out for his father. Lu RanKong paused, turned around, and saw three pairs of Xiao-like eyes staring at him, his heart felt soft, softly said, “Daddy is going out to play games with people. You also hide well, don’t be found by them. Whoever is found first will lose.”
Gu ZhuXiao didn’t know why Daddy wanted to leave alone, but he knew he couldn’t make a fuss now. Because Mom’s face was different from his usual softness and became stern as if he was a different person. Then, he saw that Mom also pulled out a gun from his back. He also had a gun, which Dad had sharpened with his own hands, but he just didn’t bring it out today, which was a shame.
“Xiao Xiao, I’ll be at the door. Take your sister and crouch there and don’t come out. No matter what happens, don’t show your head.” Lan Yu said as he leaned against the kitchen door and held the gun to the side of his head.
Gu ZhuXiao replied with a serious face, “I know. If she wants to move around, I will hold her down.”
He turned his head to see Gu ZhuZi sitting on the floor, two chubby legs stretched out, face full of mashed potatoes. She could see Lan Yu at the door, gave a cheeky smile, and wanted to climb out, but Gu ZhuXiao wouldn’t let her.
“Don’t move. You can’t go out. If you go out, you lose.” Gu ZhuXiao said.
Gu ZhuZi struggled to move out, Gu ZhuXiao held her waist and held her down. Gu ZhuZi crawled out a few times without moving, and shouted, “Bad Xiao Xiao!”
Lan Yu turned his head and made a silent gesture at her, Gu ZhuXiao followed the same action and said seriously, “Shhh, don’t make a sound.”
Gu ZhuZi looked at Lan Yu, and then turned her head to look at him, her eyebrows wrinkled.
“Are you trying to talk? No sound is allowed.” Gu ZhuXiao then said.
Gu ZhuZi pursed up her lips in exasperation and shouted again, “Bad Xiao Xiao!”
Every now and then a gunshot came from the ground floor lobby, and panicked feet ran past the restaurant door. The gun Lu RanKong used was specially made, the sound of the gun was different from other guns, Lan Yu counted silently in his heart, he had fired five shots. About ten minutes had passed since the incident, and the sound of sirens finally came from the distance, and the police finally arrived. Lan Yu knew that the bandits wouldn’t stay on the ground floor at this time and would start to go upstairs. He looked at the two children cowering in the corner and smiled reassuringly at them both.
Gu ZhuZi was pressed tightly by Gu ZhuXiao, fluttering her limbs in vain for a while like a turtle, and gave up struggling to stay still.
Looking up, she saw Lan Yu smiling at her.
She deflated her mouth pleadingly.
“Do you want to talk again? You can’t make a sound, we can’t lose.” Gu ZhuXiao reminded her again.
“Bad XiaoXiao.” Gu ZhuZi gouged the floor in front of her with her hand, holding back from crying.
Lan Yu listened to the movement outside and lowered his voice, “Xiao Xiao, you don’t have to open your mouth. Just hold her with your hands without climbing out. “
“Okay.” Gu ZhuXiao remembered his mission and hoisted Gu ZhuZi tightly.
Bang! Bang! Bang!
A fierce gunshot suddenly came from the kitchen door, and a row of bullet holes appeared on the half-open door.
Then a masked man lunged at the door, with a gun in his hand.
Lan Yu heard the sound of Lu RanKong’s gunshot, and he was somewhere in the passage outside. So he too dodged to the door and poked his head halfway out against the wall. He saw two masked bandits with their backs to him, firing at the stairway in front of them. So he raised his hand decisively, and after two shots, the two bandits fell softly.
Lu RanKong poked his head out of the upper stairway and gestured to him, meaning there were 10 bandits left. Lan Yu returned the gesture that all was well and retreated back to the kitchen entrance.
He turned his head to look at the two children.
Gu ZhuZi was pinned down by Gu ZhuXiao and couldn’t move. Seeing that Lan Yu didn’t come to her rescue, she simply gave up struggling and lay on the floor playing with her fingers. Gu ZhuXiao was still holding his sister with both hands, and his big eyes had panic in them.
Lan Yu didn’t move to look at the corpse fluttering at the gate, found Gu ZhuXiao’s position, and hurriedly comforted, “Baby, that person is playing hide-and-seek with daddy lost, and then lay down there, not wanting to move.”
He somewhat regretted not dragging the corpse away, the child must have been greatly stimulated by seeing such a scene.
Gu ZhuXiao, however, didn’t relax at all, his upper body still straight and too tense to move. Only after hearing Lan Yu’s words did he ask for help and say, “My sister seems to have pooped. I heard farting, what should I do?”
So it’s because of this… Lan Yu was slightly relieved.
“She’s still pooping, and she’s pouncing again.” Gu ZhuXiao’s face was full of pain.
Gu ZhuZi’s eyes straightened as she looked ahead, her face turned red, and her mouth made an ‘uh-uh’ sound.
Lan Yu could only say, “Baby, the game is more important than pooping. We have to hold on until the game is over, just let sister poop first.”
The sound of gunfire rang out again outside, and Lan Yu couldn’t be bothered to continue talking to him, so he felt his way to the door to help Lu RanKong. Lu RanKong kept blocking the stairway and calmly fired, killing all the bandits who intended to rush upstairs. There were several bodies lying on the stairs, and the other bandits hesitated to go upstairs.
The police were already in the lobby and a hail of gunfire rang out. The bandits were pinned back and forth and finally made a break for the stairs. Lu RanKong used the stone railing of the stairwell as a shield and shot the three men at the front. While he was changing magazines, Lan Yu fired at the bandits in the back, instantly hitting two more. The rest of them dared not charge again and shrank in place.
“Good shooting.” Lu RanKong took the time to muzzle Lan Yu and gave him a thumbs up.
Lan Yu raised his chin arrogantly at him and retreated to the kitchen door again, sidling up to the two kids and raising his gun to aim at the door.
“Sister, will you stop pooping? I can smell it, I’m dizzy, it smells so bad, it’s like… It’s like… It stinks like your poop.” In the corner, Gu ZhuXiao rambled to Gu ZhuZi over the sound of gunfire, frowning tightly, but still insisting on holding her still.
Gu ZhuZi reached down on her stomach, her fat, short fingers climbing forward on the floor, grabbed the bowl of mashed potatoes that had fallen to the floor, and scooped another spoonful into her mouth.
The gunfire continued outside, and Gu ZhuXiao heard his father’s voice coming from the passage, “All settled, maybe only one or two left.”
At that moment, Gu ZhuXiao suddenly saw a masked head at the opposite window, and his mother’s back to the window looking in the direction of the door, not noticing that someone had climbed up from downstairs.
Before he could call out, the man darted in through the half-open window.
Gu ZhuXiao’s first thought was that they had lost and been discovered. But when he saw the man rushing towards this corner, a sense of crisis rose in his heart subconsciously, and alertly jumped on Gu ZhuZi to shield her.
At the same time, he shouted, “Mom!”
The man had rushed to the front, one hand with a gun against his head, the other hand out to grab Gu ZhuZi. Gu ZhuXiao didn’t hesitate to bite at the hand that was grabbing for Gu ZhuZi.
Bang!
A gunshot echoed in the small space of the kitchen.
Gu ZhuXiao froze in his original position, watching the hooded man slowly fall to the ground.
A figure swooped in front of him, and he and Gu ZhuZi were swept into a familiar embrace, hearing his mother’s shaky voice asking, “Are you guys okay? Xiao Xiao, answer the question.”
Gu ZhuZi hiccuped, Gu ZhuXiao opened his mouth, half a day before he heard his own voice, “I’m fine. This man tried to catch sister, so I caught him and he lost.”
Lu RanKong rushed in, relieved to hear Gu ZhuXiao’s words, smiled, “Good son. You know how to protect your sister, good job.”
Gu ZhuXiao broke free from Lan Yu’s arms and pointed to the motionless man on the ground and said, “I caught him.”
“Mn, it was you who caught him.” Lan Yu’s face was still white, obviously still in the aftermath, pinching the two siblings around and checking everywhere.
“Mom, sister pooped a lot.” Gu ZhuXiao said as he twitched his nose.
The police had rushed up, the intercoms sounding everywhere, intermittently saying that the bandits had been shot down in full, and they were searching for those who hadn’t yet hidden. Lu RanKong and Lan Yu exited the restaurant with a child in each arm, and the police spotted them and quickly surrounded them before escorting them downstairs.
“I think she is soaked in poo.” Gu ZhuXiao admonished Lan Yu again on the noisy staircase. “Daddy, don’t hold her butt. Be careful of the poo…”
Gu ZhuXiao spoke with a dry mouth, but the adults ignored this point. When they got into the car, they only asked him if he was afraid just now, asked his sister if she was afraid just now, and said that it was safe now and everything was alright. They also hugged him and kissed him, hugged his sister, and kissed each other again.
Afraid, he was afraid that ah, pee spirit now became a poo spirit, but they didn’t seem to understand and were talking about some unnecessary thing, also hugging and kissing around. Forget it, he didn’t want to care and didn’t really worry about it.
The car drove on the way back to the villa and the windows were wide open. Lu RanKong drove, Gu ZhuXiao sat on the passenger side, both nostrils were stuffed with a ball of paper, expressionlessly looking ahead.
Lan Yu wiped Gu ZhuZi’s buttocks and changed her pants in the back seat, while Gu ZhuZi lay on her back on the padded leather seat, giggling and saying, “Stinky.”
“Give her back to the grey beast.” Gu ZhuXiao said to his dad with a sideways glance.
His dad said, “She was born from me, the same as you. Why should I give her back to the gray beast?”
“Don’t lie to me, I’m not a child.” Gu ZhuXiao retorted in an old-fashioned way.
Lu RanKong reached out and rubbed Gu ZhuXiao’s head, “Don’t you like your sister?”
Gu ZhuXiao wanted to say no then he heard Gu ZhuZi softly call out from behind, “Xiao Xiao.”
“Call him brother.” Lan Yu said softly.
“Brother.” Gu ZhuZi called softly again.
Gu ZhuXiao turned his head to look at his sister, and Gu ZhuZi smiled at him with bent eyes. He was torn for a moment, then looked at his dad and said, “How about we just help raise the Zi Zi beast for now.”
“Then will you still protect her?”
“I will.”
Lan Yu laughed, gently patted his daughter’s face, and said, “Quickly thank your brother.”
“Thank you, Brother.”
“You’re welcome.”
Gu ZhuZi had already wiped her bottom and changed her pants, and began to sing in a milky voice. Although she was articulate, some parts of her voice were still ambiguous, so Lan Yu hummed along with her.
“The moon is bending, shining on the sea, the lights are dotted, the fishermen’s boats are returning. The moon is bending, shining on the beach, the starlight is shining, it’s your eyes…”
After the end of the song, Lu RanKong and Gu ZhuXiao’s voices joined in, and the cool breeze of early autumn rolled into the open car window and carried the song out of the car, floating far, far away…
Addis Note:
Thank you everyone for reading this novel! I hope you liked it as much as I did! Next up, I am keeping with the author (Little Baldy) and doing another one of her novels called His Little Deer Wife is Very Fierce. This novel does have some horror elements but it is really interesting! I hope you guys continue onto this new novel with me!
Thank you so much for picking up and translating this novel! I really enjoyed it and I think I will comeback and re-read this in the future 💗
That was so good and sweet, thank you so much!
Someone else’s children are always the cutest 😂 I like how Xiao was still going on about how the ‘pee spirit almost turned into a poo spirit’ in the midst of a shootout. Cute child.
Thank you for your translation.
what a warm and exciting ending.. 😅
I wonder if the HR5 would get changed to K5 after xiao Yu gave them the secret recipe from his grandpa to the researchers to develop? cause he can’t never get the name right..like he want it to be named after him.. 😅
If met a very good novel. when you reach the ending, the feeling is really weird, just like, don’t want to separate 😭😭
from start to finish, the plot is satisfying. The characters are strong from start to finish, lots of surprises, and I really love how cute their characters can be. Lan yu and Lu Hornbill are really cute 😭😭😭 They love each other as much.
no third person, no love rivals, no household tempests, they are really sweet 😭😭😭 without conflict, without love they are that stron