Chapter 31: It’s Been a Long Time Since the Plan was Created
Translated by Addis of Exiled Rebels Scanlations
Myka didn’t know what to say.
Did he want him to say ‘I’m glad you followed me and I was not disturbed at all?’ It was true that now Myka felt horrified by the act of ‘stalking’ itself, if it was not by Sylar. Even he thought Sylar was a very nice and respectable Druid.
Myka felt that he should comfort Sylar with a few words, such as ‘in fact, I didn’t feel disturbed at all’ and ‘it doesn’t matter. I thank you for following me.’ But reason told him that he could never say that.
In a flash, Sylar had started his spell to send Myka home. There were several slips in the gate, some left by tourists and some left by villagers. The little jar Myka had dried in the window was still there.
Myka was a bit dazed while Sylar was still like a little girl who was immersed in the shy atmosphere, and neither spoke for a long time.
“I see,” Sylar said after a while. “I felt right before. There’s a reason why you prefer me to be a little animal.”
“What?” Myka once again failed to keep up with his thinking.
“Small animals are pure and harmless,” Sylar thought. “They’re plush and they’re very pleasant. When people see a cat on the roof, they think it’s cute. When they see a dog following you, they want to feed it. It’s fun to see a deer in the woods and a tit in the window.” He paused, his expression becoming more serious. “But, if there is a person lying on the roof, following you all the time, sticking his head out of the trees to watch you, sticking his face to your window… You would feel terrible.”
Myka would like to reply, ‘So you do know.’ However, Myka knew how to observe other people’s emotions. He knew that this sentence could not be said.
Sylar’s logic seemed quite right, but there must be something wrong… Myka tried to find out to persuade him not to think so, but he couldn’t think of anything for a while.
Sylar continued, “I’m sure I didn’t disturb you in those nine years. After you saved the white headed rabbit from the trap, you took it back and put it into your own bed. It was a natural reaction. But if you see a grown man’s foot caught by the trap, maybe you will help him too — because you are very kind, there’s no doubt — but you won’t bring him into the bed…”
“Of course! Is that a question?” Myka couldn’t help saying, “But it’s not like I ‘like animals better than humans’, because they are too different… You see, you are human. There is a beautiful woman who expresses her love to you. If you also like her, you will accept it. But if you become a bear at that time and another bear expresses her love to you, would you also want to accept it?”
“Of course I won’t, but I’ll calm him down and introduce him to Axtus.” Sylar said.
“Your animal companion must thank you very much…” Myka muttered. It seemed that Sylar didn’t understand the meaning of his example at all.
“In those nine years, maybe I didn’t disturb you, but it has been different since I appeared,” said Sylar in a deep voice, and his voice was soft. “I found that I couldn’t help but want you to know my mood, so I agreed to Morning Mist to help you in Lansuo valley. Besides, I have confessed to you what I have done…”
At first, Myka was not used to the soft tone of Sylar, but now he was more adapted to it. But Sylar’s words were always quite strange, which Myka had not yet adapted to.
“I hope you will accept my follow-up. I promised never to interfere in your life, but I didn’t think about it. It is already interfering with you. Myka, if I didn’t tell you that, when I finished playing the crocodile, I would have just disappeared. If I went back to tracking you, you wouldn’t think that I was ‘always talking like this’ or ’embarrassing’. But I showed up and changed your mind, and it’s no different from what Atan does.”
Myka felt a little powerless. This Druid’s heart was too thin!
“Sylar, I’m not rejecting you. I’d like to be your friend,” Myka said. “It’s just… It’s just that sometimes what you say is really embarrassing, such as what you like and what’s lovely…” The repetition of these words made Myka feel his teeth were sour. He tried his best to find an implicit statement. He was afraid that Sylar would misunderstand his meaning. “Friends will not suddenly talk like this, maybe… You have lived in the forest too long to understand…”
“Mn, I need to see what Atan is going to do,” Sylar suddenly changed the subject. “I don’t know if he is going to catch King Hollis. Of course, if King Hollis is willing to go with him, I won’t interfere. In addition, on the other side of Todd City, I will take care of Sylander’s treatment of Sovili. As a Druid, I hope the cursed innocent can be free.”
“Wait a minute —” Myka stopped Sylar as he got ready to walk down the stairs. “Er, what can I do for you?”
Obviously, Sylar’s tone hadn’t changed a lot, but Myka seemed to find that he was depressed. Myka was not a master who was good at perceiving people’s hearts. For a while, he felt vaguely that he might have said something wrong, but he didn’t know what was wrong.
It was not the first time Sylar sent him back and left to deal with other things, but this time, Myka felt that the atmosphere was not quite right, it seemed special… Formal and serious. Obviously, the matter about Atan was not serious enough for this mood.
Sylar had gone down the stairs, opened the door and stopped. He said suddenly, “Myka, I don’t want to cheat you… So please forgive my abruptness.”
Myka still felt something was wrong, so he tried to change the topic, “If there is something to do with Pink Magic, I can help. Although I’m not good at it, I’ve learned a lot of theoretical things. By the way, about Atan, he…”
“I know how to make friends with people,” said Sylar, still following the original topic, “I have Druid compatriots, my teachers… But I have to admit, I don’t think much of you as a friend.”
Myka’s heart thumped, like the sound of stepping on an empty stair, which made him dare not really stretch his legs to move down the stairs anymore.
“At first, I wanted to see what you were doing every day,” Sylar said, still standing by the door. “That was when I started tracking you. Later, I wanted to do something for you, so I’d find something I could do that you couldn’t. After that, I wanted to know more about you and make sure you didn’t run into any danger at any time. A few years later, although I had become more familiar with you and knew what you were doing every day, I still didn’t think it was enough. I wanted to keep looking at you and communicating with you, so I occasionally became a small animal or a large animal… Besides the white headed rabbit, I was also a stag, a muntjac, raccoon, gopher, falcon, cow, puffer, hippo…”
“Three good gods! What is a hippo?” Myka was embarrassed by Sylar’s first words, and gradually became hot. When he heard the names of these animals, he couldn’t help following the wrong point.
“It’s like a horse in the river anyway,” said Sylar, with a shy smile and a touch of his hair. “I hide well. You might only see the nostrils, so you won’t find me. Hippos are terrible looking. It’s good not to scare you… Later, I became a harmless little animal that came close to you. I was very happy to be able to communicate with you. I already knew you, but I still wanted you to know me. I wanted to talk with you, I wanted to see the migration of emerald lizards with you, and I wanted to take you to see the appearance of Moonlight King flowers blooming in the Emerald Forest… However, because I’ve been following you and understanding you, I know you hate to be interfered with, and you don’t like to do things according to other people’s wishes.”
Myka was stunned. His reason had been encouraging him to say something, but he could not say it.
Sylar said, “When I became a giant crocodile, I was very excited to touch you. I also imagined how close I would be to you if I were human at that time. I always thought you were just a merchant of magic goods, but later I knew you were a pink robed mage. At that time, I had a more shameful idea — I thought, if you are not shy about ‘those things’, then if I… Would you be happy if I kissed you or something? So I kissed you in the hole of King Hollis…”
“Didn’t you say it was a blessing from the son of the wilderness?”
“Yes, I didn’t deceive you. I did kiss you with the gesture of a blessing.”
Myka was eager to find a table to support his elbow so that he could put his hands on his forehead and cover his face.
“But you are very shy. Every time I say something, you have an unacceptable look,” said Sylar. “I know that outsiders also have strange prejudices about Druids, such as they say that we will love big trees, dance with bears, meditate with wolves at home, take off our clothes and catch salmon in the river… But we are not all like that, we are just very close to nature. So, I also realized that although you are a pink robed mage and are good at Pink Magic, and selling some magic goods, it does not mean that you are willing to be closer to me.”
“Stop, I think you changed the concept…” Myka made a stop sign, but his mouth couldn’t keep up with him. At this time, he envied those sorcerers who were flexible in thinking and sharp with their mouths.
“Well?” Sylar said, “I was… Even now, I want to hold your hand. Mage’s fingers are very soft, of course, this is not the whole reason; when hugging you with a bear posture, I also want to do it in my own way, I want to be with you, I want to kiss you, I want to… I don’t like to say what I think.”
Of course, Myka understood him.
At this time, Myka seemed to have several different souls living in his heart. As the saying of a pink robed mage, it was human nature. People with normal development would be interested in the people they were interested in. As a close friend, Myka said that now Sylar was obviously on the cusp of a bull. He should appease him first… There was also a weak voice that wanted to say, ‘sorry’, but what would he do if he said it!
“Myka, I’ve loved you for nine years. Believe me, it’s not sudden.” Sylar asked cautiously, “But I really need to make sure if you… can accept a male suitor?”
“It’s not a matter of men and women, it’s a matter of surprise to me!” Myka blurted out having been caught by surprise.
Incorrect. Myka immediately thought that his answer was terrible, in every sense.
Although he knew that he may be right. Sylar had been following him for nine years, but he just met Sylar. He wanted to say that there were no pursuers, women or men, because everyone thought that pink robed mages didn’t lack this, so no one was interested in him… But this didn’t seem to be the answer Sylar wanted. Even if he wanted to detour a little, he shouldn’t answer that way.
“Yes, it does,” said Sylar, nodding. “But I still like you.”
He took the purple flower off his head, but he didn’t reach out to Myka. Myka didn’t know if he should go… As a matter of fact, he was now in a daze and his feet were floating. He seriously doubted that he would step on the first stair if he took a few steps.
Sylar kissed the pistil, pinned the purple flower on the wooden door handle, then smiled at Myka and walked out of the door.
“Wait, about that…” Myka tried to continue the conversation with something else. However, when he walked down in a very unsociable step and opened the door, Sylar was no longer around the house.
Myka took the purple flower in his hand. Its stem was withered and yellow, its petals were not very bright, and it also exuded a slight fragrance of grass and trees.
“What am I supposed to say?” Myka, facing the village road in the morning, said to himself powerlessly, “I just feel, I really think it’s too sudden. How can I say the right thing?”
He walked out a few steps, looked up to see if there was a cat on the wall, a bird on the branches… There was nothing now.
“Sylar?” He tried to shout a few times and no one answered. Myka could see that Sylar had been a little down, or rather depressed. He tried to find something out of Sylar’s words, hoping to explain everything… But he didn’t know what to explain.
“It doesn’t matter if you follow me. I don’t hate you following me! Even if you are human!” He shouted again at the trees and the wall. He accidentally said something he didn’t want to say. He was a little quieter and looked around. “… As long as you remind me when you become a beast, otherwise it’s still terrible…”
Someone in the nearby house opened the window and looked at him like he was a psychopath. But Sylar seemed to have left.
In fact, Myka is right. Sylar’s living environment is separated from society, so his logic is confusing.