Translated by Yan of Exiled Rebels Scanlations
Although XiaoXue was quite speechless at the fire phoenix’s extremely compliant promise, nearly to the point that it wanted to slap a certain idiot senseless with its wing, XiaoXue was undoubtedly very happy right now concerning a certain prehistoric whale whose moral character was completely baffling—
Chirrup~ 【Can you really allow my father to regain consciousness? If you can do it, I guarantee that I’ll become your most loyal beast! And also, I will do my best to set aside my hatred towards humans.】
JinYu’s eyebrows jumped when he heard that. So this fellow actually wanted to kill all the humans? But when he thought of its experiences, Big Boss Jin could also understand. But speaking of the most loyal beast… “Hey, which one of you thinks you’re the most loyal to me, your boss?”
JinYu turned to look at the several A-rank beasts watching the show from the side. After staring at him for a few seconds, they instantly all threw themselves at each other, clawing and scratching and biting and charging.
Awooo! 【You better not fight with me! I’ve long since decided to the boss’ number one cute pet!!】
Roar! 【Go play on the side, the most loyal beasts are the ones fighting here, you go and be your cute pet no beast cares about you!】
Aooo woof! 【The dog clan has been mankind’s most loyal friend since ancient times! So now, naturally we’re the most loyal beasts! ErHei, get out of here, if you’re too weak don’t come make trouble!】
As a result, after ten minutes of fighting and biting, XiaoBai, BaoZi, ErHei, and XiaoXue exited the battle because of various mental and physical reasons. The remaining DaBai and WangWang glared at each other menacingly, as if they were about to have a fight to the death.
At that scene, JinYu turned to look at the fire phoenix, who seemed a bit stunned. He chuckled. “You see, I’m really not lacking loyal companions at my side.”
Some anger flashed across the fire phoenix’s eyes. But before it could speak, the man across from it suddenly laughed and spoke. “I treat them with the most loyal intentions, so naturally, I trust that they will treat me the same way. How can you expect to receive what you don’t give? It’s not like my reputation can be used like a purple coin credit card.”
The fire phoenix was dumbfounded, and it didn’t really understand how it had run across such a person. At that same moment, a gust of cold air suddenly swept past from the side, nearly making the fire phoenix flap its wings as a counterattack.
Chirp~ 【He’s the best master I’ve ever met, the same for XiaoBai, DaBai, and the rest. Maybe he doesn’t treat us the best, but trust me, nobody can compare to the faith and warmth he has in us. Of course, you can just ignore his occasional disgusting tastes and twitches.】XiaoXue forcefully suppressed the urge to wave its wings as it introduced its boss to the fire phoenix. Of course, it was also to deepen the feelings between two beasts. Only the heavens knew if the boss would stuff medicine down their throats if he saw that they were ignoring and avoiding each other… for a certain two-faced fellow, he had no bottom line.
The fire phoenix didn’t really express anything when it heard XiaoXue’s words. It wasn’t some soft beast that would give its trust and goodwill to any human. It had all the time in the world to appraise what this person was like in the future! But before then…
Chirp! 【Can you stay a little farther away from me?!】
XiaoXue grew furious. Fucking hell! If Laozi wasn’t being considerate of your chrysanthemum, who would pay attention to you! Sweeping down another layer of ice particles, XiaoXue walked away with its beak in the air. Chirp!【I’d rather you scram to the sky! Laozi hates excessively hot things the most!!】
As a result, the fire phoenix got angry too. But because of its heavy injury, it couldn’t attack back, so it just grumbled and chirped angrily inside its head. When my injury heals, I’ll definitely use fire to roast you!!
Just as the fire phoenix was being depressed and DaBai and WangWang were fighting passionately, JinYu and Jin Qian had already performed a restoration operation on the black phoenix. Actually, Jin Qian just removed the controlling microchips from the black phoenix’s body. JinYu was in charge of getting rid of the three microchips from the black phoenix’s head, and he also used primal energy to protect its brain.
The black phoenix’s body, veins, and organs had already been altered because of medicine, so even if JinYu had the additional help of the Earth, he couldn’t dispel all the drugs. There wasn’t a large possibility of getting the black phoenix to return back to being a fire phoenix. What they had to strive hard for was purifying and strengthening the black phoenix’s brain and body, removing the side effects of the remnants of the drugs. Simultaneously, they would try to restore the necrotic parts of the black phoenix’s memory, so it was quite a slow process.
“Oh!” The fourth time purifying the black phoenix, JinYu suddenly took a step back, a flush of red flashing across his face.
“We’ll call it a day here.” Qi Qinglin’s face darkened when he looked at JinYu, and he lifted him up and walked away.
“Eh, that was just because I wasn’t careful! I can purify one more time, really,” JinYu tried to justify himself, but he was glared by a certain boss’ golden eyes, and he immediately shut up. He thought a bit before he turned to look at the fire phoenix, who was currently looking at him too. He laughed dryly. “Um, that, the boss is trying to protect me, I’ll purify more tomorrow.”
The fire phoenix remained silent for a few seconds before it shook its head. Chirp… 【No need, three times every day is enough. Any more and I’m afraid you’ll die from overwork.】
Even though those words pierced the boss’ ears and made him want to make roasted phoenix wings, Big Boss Jin smiled when he heard that. This was quite a gauche fellow, the more he looked the more he felt like it matched very well with his XiaoXue!
Speaking of which, where was XiaoXue? JinYu suddenly felt like the space around him was a bit empty. He saw Jin Qian and Shan Bailu treating beasts, Cheng Liang and Li Xiao investigating the nearby terrain, and then… nothing.
“I feel like I’m missing something.” JinYu was silent for a second before he spoke to the boss at his side, who then nodded and said, “Those most loyal beasts of yours ran away.”
“… is that supposed to be a corny joke?” JinYu’s mouth twitched.
Qi Qinglin thought a bit. “Actually, I’m just telling the truth.”
“Telling the truth your sister! Those guys dare to run around! Do they want to hunt for their own food or what?” JinYu laughed nastily. “Unless they all want to become vegetarian!”
JinYu was happy for a few seconds before he abruptly froze. He seemed to have forgotten that there really was an omnivore who could be a vegetarian, and what’s more, that beast hadn’t been present from the beginning till now.
“I hate good-for-nothing foodies.” JinYu sighed.
Qi Qinglin coughed. “I don’t mind.” At least, he felt like his mate ate a lot but still didn’t get fat.
Just when JinYu was about to speak again, a heartrending scream came from the nearby forest, scaring all the beasts and making them tremble. JinYu also trembled after he heard the shriek, but he didn’t know if it was from anger or joy.
Wuwuwuwu!! 【It’s stuck! I’m choking because of the bamboo! Wuwuwuwu I’m stuck—!】 He pointed in a certain direction for his boss with a shaking finger. JinYu was too embarrassed to even speak anymore. He used to think that the national treasure was some high-IQ beast, but now that he thought about it again, he had definitely been hoodwinked by his patriotic, homesick feelings. It was just an idiot good-for-nothing foodie!!
By the time Qi Qinglin arrived at a fresh and green bamboo forest, carrying JinYu, what they saw was six A-rank beasts sitting in a circle, BaoZi at the front, XiaoBai at the end. A certain treasure was in the middle, suffering with a piece of bamboo stuck in its throat. It was pretending to be a corpse, and its stomach was already round enough to look like a little ball.
When BaoZi and the rest saw JinYu arrive, their originally worried expressions instantly vanished. They immediately burst out in laughter, as if they wanted to laugh themselves to death.
Aoo~ 【Ah hahahaha! This is the first time I’ve seen someone who can choke themselves because of eating too much! I’m dying, it’s not like that’s a fishbone!】
Meoow~ 【Pah! Even if it was a fishbone I wouldn’t choke on it, this is fucking bamboo, bamboo! Non-attacking bamboo! This guy is too much!】
Woof woof~ 【I feel like it’s even dumber than me, right? Hahahaha, this is the pathetic consequence of sneaking food! Wrath of Heaven… pfft!】
Chirp… 【Hey, that’s enough. The boss is here.】
Roar and woof. 【Hey, don’t overdo it, I heard that pandas bear strong grudges.】
After Boss Jin silently listened to that exchange, he immediately turned around, alarming those fellows delighting in someone else’s misfortune. But in the next moment, he started hammering the tree trunk and laughing loudly, “Haha… hahahaha! You stupid ass panda that choked eating bamboo! Haha, I’m dying, I have to laugh a while first, did the generational gap inheritance not tell you that you have to chew the bamboo first?! Or have you not grown teeth yet! HAhahaha! Hahaha!”
Needless to say, a boss who could raise beasts who took such delight in others’ misfortune was also not the kind of master who had pity.
Of course, the most pathetic one was still XiaoBao, prostrate on the ground. While tears flowed silently down its face, it tried hard to swallow the bamboo, while it sucked in air as it covered the left area of its throat where the bamboo was stuck.
Whimper… fuck, it was definitely the most pathetic panda in all history!! What was worse than losing face in front of the boss and those two-faced beasts!!
“Cough cough, okay okay, uh come over and let me see. I’d still feel bad if you really choked to death, let me rub it.”
Once JinYu finished laughing, he walked over to XiaoBao’s side and scooped it up. After looking it over, he didn’t know whether to laugh or cry again. The half-baked doctor probably had to do surgery.
Ao! 【I-I don’t want to do surgery!】
JinYu’s mouth twitched. “What to do about the bamboo if you don’t do surgery?”
Wahhhh wuwuwu… 【I don’t wanna do surgery, even if I die I don’t wanna!】
JinYu felt black lines running down his face as he stared at the little fella rolling around his lap, whimpering and pretending to be pitiful, awfully helpless. Finally, he clenched his teeth and forced open XiaoBao’s mouth. Using his spiritual energy like a thin knife, he accurately chopped off the thin and hard bamboo sliver stuck deep in the depths of XiaoBao’s throat, before there was an expression of remorse on his face.
“Aooo… hey! It’s better now, I swallowed it! It doesn’t hurt anymore!” XiaoBao swallowed hard, and it rubbed happily in JinYu’s lap like it won first place after it discovered the bamboo piece was gone. “Master~ I like you a lot~”
JinYu’s mouth twitched. “It’s nothing, just a piece of bamboo… speaking of which, what’s wrong with you, do you not know that pandas usually eat bamboo shoots and leaves? They’ll pick the tender bamboo if they have to eat it, you – you idiot, why are you gnawing on the oldest and hardest bamboo?!”
XiaoBao was startled, before it silently curled into a ball, indicating it didn’t want to speak. Could it say that it was so happy when it saw this bamboo forest that it just threw itself in and started eating everything it saw?! It would die before it said it!
“… from what I can tell, you still need experience.” JinYu reached a decisive verdict, earning BaoZi and the rest’s explosive laughter.
“Enough enough, you’ve eaten enough bamboo too, BaoZi, you guys have laughed enough as well. Let’s go back. I just took over this place, so there’s a lot of things I haven’t cleared up yet. Everyone’s also tired today, so let’s go back and rest.”
JinYu waved his hand and put XiaoBao on WangWang’s head before turning and walking back with Big Boss Qi. He had to carefully consider how this happened.
After returning to the meadow, the sky was already dark, and the originally clear sky had become tinted by a splendid red, revealing a kind of gentle and reluctant warmth. All the beasts were sprawled across the meadow watching the setting sun, slowly relaxing, and some even fell asleep. Everything seemed so comforting and peaceful… speaking of which, what was up with that wooden house?
Shan Bailu, who was standing in front of the house, saw JinYu look over. He immediately waved excitedly and was about to shout when he was pushed onto the ground by Jin Qian.
“Why did you hit me?!” Shan Bailu was furious.
“Don’t bother the beasts. This is their hard-earned rest.” Jin Qian’s expression was calm. “Or do you want to be beaten up by them if they get woken up? We can make a bet, will you be bitten to crumbs by them first, or will they bite you into crumbs first?”
“Those are both the same thing! Do you think I’m stupid?”
Jin Qian looked at Shan Bailu with pity before he looked at JinYu, who was walking over. “How is it, isn’t this house pretty good? Our efficiency is high~”
“Actually, I felt like we could spread animal skins on top, but this place is quite strange. Cheng Liang and I looked around but we couldn’t find a single living creature. How to say it, this place feels very—”
“Deathly still, right?” JinYu interrupted. “That was what I was getting ready to tell you as well. Since you guys are already here, then you have the qualifications to hear about what happened. But before that, illegal logging is a punishable offence, do you all understand?”
After entering the wooden house, JinYu now had a purple coin and two fine IOUs.
“Hehe, actually I saw that since you guys didn’t cut down the ancient trees or saplings, it should be fine since there are so many trees here.” JinYu laughed as he looked at the money in his hand, and he earned the increasingly scornful stares of the people sitting across from him.
Of course that wasn’t enough to bother our Big Boss Jin. He cleared his throat and started talking. “This could be considered the earth.”
“That’s what I was saying!!”
“What do you mean by ‘considered’?”
Clearly, the word ‘earth’ shocked the people sitting across. Even though the scenery here looked remarkably like the scenery of that rumored existence, and it also gave them a close sense of peace, when they suddenly heard the definitive words, it was still a little hard to believe.
After all, from the time they were born until now, the earth only existed in their dreams and imaginations. That was the home that all the humans longed for in the past. But much, much too long ago, they lost their way home, and were now floating in the cosmos. So now that they had achieved the dream their ancestors had died before achieving, the shock they received was a little too much.
“My god… I have to take some pictures as souvenirs later! Ahhh! Who brought the camera?! I’m going crazy, I’m on earth! Earth! How many people can I scare by saying that!!” Shan Bailu excitedly flipped through his backpack before he gritted his teeth. He swore that from now on, even if he was just eating or sleeping he was going to bring his camera!!
“Tsk! Quiet down!” Jin Qian kicked Shan Bailu to the side with a darkened face. He looked at JinYu deeply. “What relationship do you have with it? Never mind, just explain first, is this the earth or not? If it is, it should have some life.”
JinYu smiled at that. Sure enough, this was the nit-picking type. Nobody thought as much as he did.
He nodded before he moved over to Qi Qinglin’s side. He then straightened and started to explain seriously, “This place is really the earth, but it’s no longer the earth that it once was. You all should also know that mankind fled earth because of a huge disaster in the past. After wandering around for thousands of years, nearly tens of thousands of years, they finally came to this constellation. In that time, an enormous change happened to the earth and its surroundings. It’s pretty complicated, so I won’t go into it, but in any case it’s because of a mutation in a certain creature’s evolutionary cycle. It made all the animals on this earth die out, leaving behind only vegetation. But if this continues, it won’t be long before all the plants on earth will also die.”
“Once that time comes, the earth will begin a new cycle of evolution. But because the galaxy has made the earth’s environment deviate slightly, perhaps it isn’t a threat to the already matured organisms, but for those that were just born, the deviation is devastating. In other words, the earth has indicated that it wants living creatures, even if they’re a little weird.”
The people who originally had grave expressions felt their feet slip from under them at JinYu’s last words.
“Boss! Can you not make jokes with such a serious expression? How could a star be alive!”
JinYu apologized with a smile. But to Qi Qinglin and Jin Qian, his smile gave off the kind of feeling that made people feel apprehensive and fearful.
“Hehe, I was joking, yes. In any case, if nature here wants to transform into a positive cycle, animals are needed. Maybe if the beasts come here, they would still need to adapt to their environments, but I think that their survival instincts and the blood flowing in their veins will quickly tell them how to survive here.”
Li Xiao’s eyes lit up. “Are you planning to let those injured beasts live here?”
“That’s right. There’s a lot of space here, and all sorts of environments. I think that they’ll like it here. It just so happens that I won’t have to worry about where to find enough space to take them in, so this is a win-win.” JinYu nodded. “However, in the first few years, I won’t introduce beasts to live here in large quantities. Beasts’ ability to survive is originally much greater than that of animals. So for balance, I will first let those injured or young beasts come here. And at the appropriate time, I will end their behaviors.”
“This is what I’m going to discuss with that old guy in a bit. In any case, you should all be aware of the situation now, right? Ah, I almost forgot, the only reason we can all come here is because of my blood and luck. En, that means I’m the gatekeeper and guard of this place. You all can come here because I opened the door, but leaving… naturally is if I kick you all out.” A beautiful smile appeared on his face. “Considering my uniqueness and monopolization, I’ll give you two choices.”
“Those who want to participate in the discovery day trip of the earth’s fine delicacies and minerals, please pay the tour fee, sightseeing fee, and environmental protection fee, a hundred purple coins in total. Or, I will send everyone back to their homes for free.
Haha, Business as usual
Professional Scammer Alert
Thank you for the chapter! Good laugh! Jin Yu is so Jin Yu!
Savage and unscrupulous business whale.
Thank you for the update!