Translated by J.
Tuoba carefully examined Moqi’s sheepish look. He ruminated for a moment before exclaiming with astonishment as if he had just discovered a brand-new continent, “Are you a virgin?!”
Moqi bit out through gritted teeth, “Shut up!”
In a slightly injured tone, Tuoba replied, “Seems like you are.”
Moqi felt humiliated but was unable to provide a rebuttal, so he remained silent. He could only clench his powerful fists into tight balls, cracking his knuckles loudly while veins bulged from his forehead.
Tuoba revealed a mirthful smile and whispered in the tone of ‘can I tell you a little secret?’, “Actually, I’m a virgin too.”
Moqi was furious. He could not help but curse out loud, “Bullshit!”
“I really am back there! Hahahahaha!” Tuoba slapped the ground while he guffawed. After laughing for a while longer, Tuoba propped up his torso and climbed up Moqi’s arm as he edged closer to Moqi’s body. Blowing a warm breath in the admiral’s ear, Tuoba teased, “Since we have nothing better to do, do you want to lose our virginity together?”
Moqi was so triggered that he flushed from his face to his neck as if he was about to explode any second and shoot Tuoba dead where he stood. However, despite the burglar’s provocations, Moqi did not refuse his offer.
Of course, he did not accept either.
It was clear that deep down inside, the old virgin was quite keen to lose his virginity, but his sense of propriety did not allow it.
“Hahaha, how cute! If you want it, just say so.” Tuoba cracked up laughing from Moqi’s sheepish look of not wanting to accept, but also not wanting to not accept.
It seemed taunting a handsome, yet righteous old virgin was more fun than stealing. Of course, the keyword being ‘handsome’…
In that instant, the burglar had found a new purpose in life.
Exasperated, Moqi wiped his flustered face with his hands. Pursing his lips into a straight line, he got up menacingly and climbed onto a nearby rock that was taller than a person.
Looking around, the island seemed very small and Moqi could survey the island in its entirety from where he stood. After observing for a while, he jumped down from the huge rock and returned to Tuoba’s side, crushing the gravel under his heavy boots.
“Deserted island. Quite small.” Moqi reported tersely as if he did not want to waste even a single word on Tuoba.
Tuoba licked his somewhat parched lips before asking, “Do you have a way out of here? Can’t you summon a few dolphins or whales or something to carry us away?”
Moqi quietly closed his eyes and knotted his brow intently, his eyelids slightly quivering as he did. Then re-opening his eyes after a few moments, still terse, he replied, “I can’t sense any large fish nearby.”
There was a limit to the reach of the admiral’s powers. He could not sense sea creatures outside his reach like ordinary people could not see things that were too far away.
However, escaping from the remote island was not impossible for Moqi. If he really wanted to, he could transform into the Kraken at will. Since the Kraken was a monster of the deep sea, once Moqi transformed, he would be free to leave the island. Although Moqi would be overcome with bloodlust and lose his humanity on nights of the full moon, on other days, he was well in control of his mental faculties after his transformation. So, this was a feasible way of getting off the island.”
But the problem was that Moqi did not want anyone to know he could transform into the Kraken. Though it was common knowledge that his moods had the ability to cause tsunamis and he had miraculous power over sea creatures, but apart from that black-hearted Little Master Murong and Moqi’s closest family, no one knew the true source of his power. And since the Kraken’s terrifying appearance and the full moon’s madness was the root of Moqi’s deep sense of self-pity, it was a secret he guarded close to his chest. No one wanted to admit to the fact that a hideous, evil creature resided within them, including Admiral Moqi.
Especially in front of Tuoba. Moqi could not bear the thought of Tuoba teasing and mocking him with that vicious tongue of his if he ever found out about the admiral’s secret…just thinking about it gave Moqi a headache.
“Then what should we do?” Tuoba revealed a rare look of helplessness.
Afterall, there was no transportation he could steal on a deserted island.
“We wait.” Moqi hesitated for a brief moment, deciding that he would not reveal his secret unless it was absolutely necessary. He calmly reasoned, “Maybe my fleet can estimate our approximate location from the ocean currents, or maybe ships will pass by the island.
“Okay!” Tuoba shot up his eyebrows with optimism and stopped worrying about this particular problem, as if he had complete confidence in the fact that they would be rescued. Then looking down with his dreamy, lustful eyes, he set his gaze upon the admiral’s crotch, “I’m thirsty.”
Moqi’s face twitched. He bit out through clenched teeth, “Why are you staring over there if you’re thirsty?”
Tuoba widened his eyes innocently, as if it was the admiral who was reading too much into the situation, “I have to look somewhere, no?”
Moqi had no retort to that, so he glowered at Tuoba instead.
Tuoba closed his eyes and replied with an injured tone, “Then I won’t look at anything, alright? I’m thirsty.”
Moqi remained silent.
Tuoba teased with that smart mouth of his, “Aren’t you a virgin? Why are you reading so much into this? Are you really a virgin?”
The admiral had no outlet to vent his fury, so with bloodshot eyes, he bellowed, “Wait quietly!”
It was not long before several dozen small fish exploded out of the sea. The silvery white fish leapt into the air, forming a shiny arc before raining down next to Moqi and Tuoba’s feet in a loud spatter.
Moqi retrieved the sabre hanging from his waist and unsheathed it from its scabbard. Grabbing a silver fish with a firm hand, he chopped off its head, then cut a cross on the fish’s back with the tip of his blade. Squeezing water out of the cut like crushing orange juice, he caught the droplets with his mouth.
After ‘drinking’ a whole fish, Moqi threw its wrinkled dry corpse onto the ground. He stiffened his neck and looked straight ahead without casting as much as a glance at Tuoba, then gruffly explained, “This type of fish contains up to 80% water. The juices may not taste like much, but at least you won’t die from thirst.” He repeated the method on another fish before turning around and handing it to Tuoba, then froze on the spot like he was under a petrification spell.
Meanwhile, next to him, Tuoba studied a geoduck clam1 in his hand with intense focus.
The geoduck clam was accidentally brought up by the admiral when he summoned the fish earlier…
Normally, the admiral would never eat geoduck clams. Even if he did, it would be prepared by someone else and he would never cook it himself. This was because geoduck clams had the appearance of an enormous cock. The admiral, who loved cooking seafood, once tried to make it himself. But as he cut open the clam’s flesh, his own cock throbbed with a dull pain due to psychosomatic factors.
With a mirthful laugh, Tuoba quipped, “Haha, this thing looks just like a…”
Moqi cruelly interrupted, “Don’t you dare say it.”
Tuoba obediently bit back the offending word. Opening his thin lips, he extended his pink tongue. While staying approximately one millimetre2 away from the clam’s actual body, Tuoba pretentiously ‘licked’ the clam’s exposed flesh from top to bottom.
During his performance, Tuoba lowered his thick lashes and half-closed his eyes, even giving off a soft moan as he licked. Over the thin layer of air, his nimble tongue skilfully slipped across the cock-shaped clam flesh, just like he was…
The baffled clam, “…”
Can I be frank? You humans are truly bizarre.
As an old virgin who could not vent his lust through normal means, Admiral Moqi stared without blinking.
At that, Tuoba’s eyes darted up. His rippling gaze swept down to Moqi’s crotch, then amorously looked up again. When his gaze reached Moqi’s flustered face, Tuoba smacked his lips as he noted, “This thing must be tasty.”
Despite knowing full well that Tuoba was talking about the clam, but emotionally, His Admiralship’s mind landed in the gutter as expected. A scorching blaze burned in his body without release, propelling him to urgently find some place to wank off.
Tuoba licked his lips greedily, then quietly groaned, “Ah…I really want to taste it. I wonder if the geoduck clam is a virgin…”
“That’s enough!” Burning from both the fires of anger and the fires of lust, Moqi grabbed the geoduck clam from Tuoba’s hand, and with the perfect technique for shot put throwing, he flung the innocent clam back into the ocean quite some distance away.
The frightened clam released a stream of clear, translucent saltwater as it flew through the air.
Instantly bringing up dirty images to his mind, Moqi’s stern, righteous face became even more flustered…
“Hahahahaha!” Placing his hands over his stomach, Tuoba rolled around on the ground, howling with laughter.
“Stop laughing.” With the same forceful presence he used in front of his troops, Moqi commanded, “And stand up straight!”
Not only did Tuoba not stand up, he also rolled over again with his hands still holding his belly. With his butt facing the admiral, Tuoba continued his guffawing.
Laughing at everything, the burglar was hopeless.
Admiral Moqi, who normally expected obedience from the people around him, fell into an awkward silence and focused 200% of his attention on the little siren who dared to defy him.
Using Moqi’s method, the two of them filled their stomachs. Afterall, Moqi could summon as many fish as he pleased. Once they solved the problem of food and water, Tuoba scouted around the deserted island. Since the island was fairly small, with Tuoba’s inhuman speed, he covered the entire island in the space of a few minutes, and successfully found a suitable place for them to spend the night.
It was a small opening enclosed by giant, naturally-forming rocks that blocked the breeze coming from the ocean. Tuoba then filled the gaps between the rock face with some smaller rocks, improving their shield from the wind.
As for the space above their heads, there was nothing they could do. This crappy place was so barren that not even grass grew between the rocks. Apart from large rocks, there were only small rocks. They only prayed that Young Master Huangfu stayed in a good mood instead of unleashing thunder and rain whenever he pleased.
Once they fixed up the clearing in which they intended to spend the night, the sun had almost set below the horizon. Tuoba called Moqi over in a provocative tone, “Let’s stay here tonight.”
Moqi hummed his response with a frosty face.
“Sigh. There isn’t anything to start a fire with.” Tuoba stated helplessly, “It’ll be cold when it gets dark.”
A chill blew through some gaps in the rocks, making the admiral sneeze.
Tuoba, “See?! It’s really easy to catch a cold.”
Moqi shot a sidelong glance at the burglar and began an internal deliberation.
Should I transform into the Kraken and bring Tuoba with me?
While His Admiralship was still debating with himself, Tuoba suddenly interrupted, “But as virgins, our bodies are naturally warmer than other people, maybe we won’t catch a cold.”
Moqi immediately wanted to strangle him.
At that, the admiral had decided that he would rather die than transform in front of Tuoba.
The reason being, if Tuoba was able to tease him all day long with that tedious virgin gag without even repeating himself, the consequences would be unthinkable if he discovered an even more lucrative secret.
Once night had fallen upon the island, Moqi and Tuoba laid on opposite sides of the small clearing between the rocks, approximately one metre3 apart.
Tuoba’s slightly nasally voice drifted into Moqi’s ears, sounding somewhat pitiful, “Admiral.”
Moqi decided not to speak. He pursed his lips and pretended to be asleep.
Tuoba continued his pitiful whimper, “I’m cold.”
Sounding different from his usual flippant tone, the two words he spoke were soft and slow, his voice more frail than usual. The sound drifted over with the chilled air like a small hand tickling Moqi’s heart. As if possessed by the seductive poison of Gu worms4, Moqi could not control himself as he opened his mouth to speak, “Come over here then.”
He regretted it as soon as the words left his mouth.
But it was too late, Tuoba had already rolled over and stuck his body snugly to Moqi’s back. Extending one arm around Moqi’s waist, he nuzzled his cheeks against Moqi’s shoulder, “Turn around and face me.”
Moqi coldly replied, “No.”
Tuoba goaded perceptively, “You’re afraid of me.”
It was a cheap shot at reverse psychology, but the admiral quite willingly fell for it.
“Ha, you’ve got to be kidding me.” Moqi sneered as he turned around. The two of them stuck to each other face-to-face, chest-to-chest and thigh-to-thigh.
Away from the artificial lights, the sky above them was so clear, it was as if the heavens had been rinsed clean by water. The stars quietly emitted a cold light in the endless night sky. As if submerged in the depths of a dark, freezing pond, all of heaven, earth and ocean had an air of solidary chill about them. All except the person in his arms, who was warm and alive …
Moqi swallowed hard, his Adam’s Apple bobbing with a highly conspicuous glug.
“You know…” Tuoba edged his already very close face even closer to Moqi. With smouldering eyes, his warm, moist breath gently blew over Moqi’s face, and at the same time, breathing in Moqi’s increasingly heavy gasps. Their lips were so close that they almost touched, just missing a little bit, perhaps less than a single a millimetre…
Moqi’s mouth became parched as emotions roiled in his chest. Images of Tuoba kissing him on the cruise earlier repeatedly flooded his mind.
The admiral’s resolve was beginning to waver.
But at this critical juncture, Tuoba slightly pulled his face away and spoke in a serious tone, “You know, when two people face each other like this, they can reduce the loss of moisture in their breaths.”
The admiral’s face suddenly exploded with spectacular colour.
The Admiral: As a thirty-year-old virgin, I really can’t take much more of this teasing.