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Chapter 51

After Zhu Xi and Nan Ge Er stared at each other for a long time, Nan Ge Er suddenly turned around without a word, walking back to Zhu Xi’s house.

Zhu Xi caught up to Nan Ge Er, blocking his path, “What are you going there for?”

Nan Ge Er lifted his head up after a brief silence. With his eyes on Zhu Xi, he replied, “I just want to take it away.”

“Huh?” Zhu Xi’s poker face changed into one of confusion.

“The lunch leftovers. I want to bring back some for Mo Shu.” Nan Ge Er stated calmly, “I can, right?”

It was obvious Zhu Xi had no idea what exactly Nan Ge Er was planning to do, so he answered after a short daze, “You can…”

Nan Ge Er nodded, before circling past Zhu Xi and heading towards his house.

After being rooted on the spot for some time, Zhu Xi followed along.

“Are you not planning to say anything about it?”

“About what?” Nan Ge Er didn’t even turn his head back to him.

“The truth and all…”

“Since it’s already forgotten, why still bring it up?” Nan Ge Er simply gave a soft reply without stopping his footsteps, “Besides, as you said earlier, your parents get along well, so why will I want to demolish all of this?”

“I thought you were going to tell Mo Shu… or my mother.”

“Mo Shu already lost his mother years ago; he’s already used to it. As for your mother, she is the one who chooses to forget it. That’s all the more reason not to let her regain those memories.” Nan Ge Er whispered, “The current peace did not come easily.” He continued after a pause, “Moreover, I don’t believe it will be better for Mo Shu to learn the truth.”

Not every truth was hidden with ill intentions.

Sometimes, they were concealed to protect the parties involved from suffering any more injuries.

Nan Ge Er words silenced Zhu Xi momentarily.

After walking wordlessly for some distance, Zhu Xi spoke again, “That guy…isn’t really close to his father.”

Nan Ge Er turned back to look at Zhu Xi.

Zhu Xi lowered his head as he strolled with Nan Ge Er, “Ever since he could climb and run, he was selected to be a candidate due to his talents. So, his chances of meeting his father were slim. Besides, as…” He hesitated a little, seemingly finding it difficult to continue, “as he looked quite similar to Mother when he was young, he wasn’t really well liked by his father.

“This isn’t really much of a secret, anyone with a sharp mind knows about it. Just that everyone made a coincidental decision to keep mom.” Zhu Xi added, “So, actually, that fellow is just like a monster that grew up without any care, someone with not many openings.”

“Because his surname is Mo.” Nan Ge Er smiled. He believed it wasn’t only Mo Shu, others with the surname Mo in Guang Tian were raised like that.

Zhu Xi pulled his lips up, making sort of a smile, “Right; because… his surname is Mo.”

“Are you trying to put in a good word for Mo Shu, to elicit my sympathy?” Nan Ge Er asked all of a sudden.

Zhu Xi perked up his head, looking at the person standing in front of him and let out an abrupt laughter, “No, no. I’m just warning you.”

“Warning me?” Puzzled, Nan Ge Er repeated.

“When a person’s love is shared among many others, it naturally will become much milder, and gentler.” Zhu Xi explained, “I have my parents, neighbors, friends, and the responsibility of Guang Tian.” He shrugged his shoulders as he smiled at Nan Ge Er, “Whereas Mo Shu only has Guang Tian…and…” he struck out his finger, pointing at Nan Ge Er, “you.”

The moment Nan Ge Er was pointed as so by Zhu Xi, he could almost feel his feelings thickening up at that instant. He took a small step back involuntarily.

It wasn’t certain what Zhu Xi had discovered from Nan Ge Er’s expression. He chuckled abruptly, “Scared?”

Nan Ge Er shook his head and smiled briefly, before turning back to continue his journey to Zhu Xi’s house, “No. I just suddenly realized, we are about the same.”

Same for me. I don’t have any family or friends; I only have Guang Tian, a place where I can settle down, and that idiot who only knows how to gaze at me starry-eyed.

“I’m no better than him.” Nan Ge Er murmured, “So you don’t have to worry. As long as he doesn’t get weary of me, I’ll definitely take him on to the end.” The time limit isn’t really long anyway, it lasting till I slip to my real final slumber is enough.

“Who-who is worried for that devil?!” Zhu Xi shouted like a tsundere at the back.

“Yes, yes, yes…” Nan Ge Er replied nonchalantly, “I’m the one who’s worried. I’m worried that fellow will have diabetes real soon because of too many sweets.”


“Sweet-ish urine.” Nan Ge Er jabbed mischievously.

“Ugh..” Zhu Xi let out a weird sound at the back, answering after a long while, “You’re really…”

“Disgusting.” Nan Ge Er finished the sentence unperturbedly.

Zhu Xi twitched his lips, criticising in his heart—You know that too?

“Why did you suddenly think of bringing lunch to that fellow?” After a quiet walk back, Zhu Xi started talking again when they were about to reach his home.

“Because he probably doesn’t have many chances to eat his mother’s home cooked meals.” Nan Ge Er answered coolly as he stood in front of the door.

Zhu Xi was mute for a while, before whispering, “As Mother had taken that kind of medicine, lots of her memories became jumbled up. The doctor advised not to let them meet. If not, the surge of emotions arose will lead to worse consequences.” He clarified, as though explaining.

“Is there any side effects?” Nan Ge Er nodded, reaching his hand out to knock on the door, “Mn, there is no other meanings behind the question. Besides, an elder brother should yield to his younger brother; you don’t have to be guilty about it.” Moreover, Mo Shu doesn’t have any clue at all.

“Who would feel guilty about it?!” Zhu Xi howled again.

“Yes, yes, yes.” Nan Ge Er replied without any sincerity, “I’m the one feeling guilty. I’m guilty of not even realizing the two of you surprisingly look a little similar. How amazing.”

“Hey!” Zhu Xi’s tone was slightly fuming, “Xiao Nan, you’re starting to get naughty.”

“All thanks to the teachings from citizens of Guang Tian,” Nan Ge Er smiled as his brows leaped up, “and many thanks for the care from Advisor.”

Zhu Xi noticed Nan Ge Er had an unrivaled glib tongue today. Thus, he shut his mouth up knowingly, while secretly noting down this grudge in his heart.

Hearing Nan Ge Er wanted to take some food away for Mo Shu, who was working at the government office then, Auntie Zhu cooked a few more dishes in joy, and let Nan Ge Er carry them back.

By the time they returned to the government office, meal time had already passed. Furthermore, the poor Mo Shu-xian sheng was still working and missed his lunch time. Coincidentally, Zhu Xi had to settle an urgent matter and left in a hurry. With that, only Nan Ge Er and Mo Shu, who buried his head in the takeaway, were left in the canteen.

“Is it nice?” Nan Ge Er sat by Mo Shu’s side, asking him.

After swallowing the food in his mouth, he turned his head towards Nan Ge Er and smiled, “Mn.” He then swooped down to eat again.

It felt as if he was making Nan Ge Er one of his side dishes.

Due to that, Nan Ge Er, being treated as his side dish, felt extreme pressure.

Nan Ge Er coughed and asked again, “What do you think about today’s lunch?”

Mo Shu lifted his head, glancing at him in confusion, “It is pretty good.” Didn’t I answer it just now?

As Nan Ge Er looked at that innocent expression on Mo Shu, he couldn’t control himself from wanting to whack him.

“Don’t you find anything different?” He probed.

Mo Shu blinked, before revealing a look as though light had dawned on him in that second. He gazed at Nan Ge Er with an expression as tender as dew while speaking lovingly, “It is something Xiao Nan specially brought back for me, of course it is delicious.”

What in the world am I conflicted about just now?!

Black lines fall on Nan Ge Er’s head.

“But,” Mo Shu chuckled, “Homemade food like this is indeed rare for me.” In the past, before Nan Ge Er’s arrival, the kitchen auntie always cooked using a large pot. When Nan Ge Er arrived, Mo Shu would usually prepare his meals himself.

There really was nothing wrong with his reply.

However, once Nan Ge Er heard it, he felt something seemingly pricking at a particular area in his heart.

The pain was fragmented.

Mo Shu would never know, contrary to what he thought, his mother hadn’t died.

He would never know that his maternal half-brother could eat his mother’s homemade cooking almost daily.

And yet he was alone. In an ignorant, fearless state, he grew up gradually—he wasn’t even capable of learning pain and loneliness.

This was too unfair to Mo Shu.

At that moment, Nan Ge Er even had the urge to tell Mo Shu.

You deserve the love of your mother, instead of living in loneliness by yourself.

“What’s wrong?” When Mo Shu noticed Nan Ge Er frowning as he looked at him, he placed the bowl and chopsticks down.

Nan Ge Er came back to his sense, before smiling towards Mo Shu, “Mo Shu.”

“Hmm?” Mo Shu reached out to stroke Nan Ge Er’s head.

“Are your parents close?”

“I guess so.” Mo Shu pondered, “Since I remembered Father being depressed all day long. Once I was able to take over the work in Guang Tian, he simply contracted a serious illness, releasing himself to the other world.”

Nan Ge Er smiled, “Mn, judging from that, your parents must be really close.”

Mo Shu didn’t know why Nan Ge Er mentioned this to him, but still, he nodded cooperatively.

“Mo Shu is the proof of their love.” Nan Ge Er chuckled, taking the initiative and hugged Mo Shu, “Although your parents have passed, you have me now.” This will do. No need to mention anything in the past. Since scabs are already formed on the wounds, there’s no need to scratch out fresh blood from them.

Having me here is enough…

Mo Shu was rather astonished by how initiative Nan Ge Er was, but he would never reject Nan Ge Er’s hugs. Hence, he followed suit and embraced Nan Ge Er, “You have me too.”


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Rikko (Translator)

Loves BL and bunny rabbits.


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34 Tell us your thoughts on the chapter.
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September 9, 2018 4:11 am

Thanks for the chapter! This really reminds me of fruits basket. There, only one of the 2 forgets while the other has to live with the pain. This situation is a lot easier for everyone. Clean slate.

September 9, 2018 10:07 am

My tear dropped after reading the last sentence ‘you have me too’
Gosh…may they will live happily ever after
Thank you for your hard work on every projects you guys do

September 10, 2018 8:22 pm

This is such a beautiful story. Thank you for sharing it with us! x3

Those two are my fave ship. May they have endless happiness x3

October 18, 2018 3:44 am

Bittersweet. And they’ll always have each other.

March 11, 2019 7:40 pm

They have each other and that’s enough. But It’s still sad. Poor Mo Shu.

Thanks for the chapter!

March 14, 2019 8:35 am

Nan Ge Er….. I think the readers might also got some diabetes >.<

February 21, 2020 8:54 am

Ohh those last parts. I felt like someone’s squeezing my heart

January 13, 2021 12:06 am

Yes, the one that had it the hardest definitely Mo Shu’s father. Well, he had left already.

Now Xiao Nan, why don’t you learn to cook from Aunty Zhu and then you can cook for Mo Shu some day. Rotating between homemade food by Mo Shu and you.

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